时间:2017年10月23日 03:25:13

A simple truth about happinessAfter I gave a talk on the subject of happiness,a woman in the audience stood up and said,“I wish my husband had come.”“Much as I loved him,”she explained,“it wasn’t easy being married to someone so unhappy.”This woman enabled me to put into words what I had been searching --altruistic1),as well as the personal,reasons taking happiness seriously.I told her that each of us owes it to our spouse),our children,our friends to be as happy as we can. I was not a particularly happy child,and like most teenagers,I took pleasure in my anguish.One day,however,it occurred to me that I was taking the easy way out.Anyone could be unhappy;it took no courage and eft.True achievement lay in struggling to be happy.The notion that we have to work at happiness comes as news to many people.We assume it’s a feeling that comes as a result of good things that just happen to us,things over which we have little or no control.But the opposite is true:happiness is largely under our control.It is a battle to be fought and not a feeling to be awaited.To achieve a happy life,it’s necessary to overcome some stumbling blocks,three of which are: Comparison with Others Most of us compare ourselves with anyone we think is happier--a relative,an acquaintance or,often someone we barely know.I once met a young man who struck me as particularly successful and happy.He spoke of his love his beautiful wife and their three daughters,and of his joy at being a radio talk-show host in a city he loved.I remember thinking that he was one of those lucky few whom everything goes eftlessly right.Then we started talking about the Internet.He blessed its existence,he told me ,because he could look up inmation on multiple sclerosis3)--the terrible disease afflicting his wife.I felt like a fool assuming nothing unhappy existed in his life. Images of Perfection Almost all of us have images of how life should be.The problem,of course,is that only rarely do people’s jobs,spouses and children live up to these imagined ideals.Here’s a personal example:no one in my family had ever divorced.I assumed that marriage was life.So when my wife and I divorced after five years of marriage and three years after the birth of our son,my world collapsed.I was a failure in my own eyes.I later remarried and confided to my wife that I couldn’t shake the feeling that my family life had failed.She asked me what was wrong with our family now(which included her daughter from a previous marriage and my son).I had to admit that,aside from the pain of being with my son only half the time (my ex-wife and I shared custody)),our family life was wonderful.“Then why don’t you celebrate it?”she asked.That’s what I decided to do.But first I had to get rid of a “perfect” family.“Missing Tile5)” Syndrome6) One effective way of destroying happiness is to look at something and focus on even the smallest flaw.It’s like looking at the tiled ceiling and concentrating on the space where one tile is missing.As a bald man told me ,“whenever I enter a room,all I see is hair.”Once you’ve determined what your missing tile is,explore whether acquiring it will really make you happy.Then do one of the three things:get it,replace it with a different tile,or get about it and focus on the tiles in your life that are not missing.We all know people who have had a relatively easy life yet are essentially unhappy.And we know people who have suffered a great deal but generally remain happy.The first secret is gratitude.All happy people are grateful.Ungrateful people cannot be happy.We tend to think that being unhappy leads people to complain,but it’s truer to say that complaining leads to people becoming unhappy. The second secret is realizing that happiness is a byproduct7) of something else.The most obvious sources are those pursuits that give our lives purpose--anything from studying insects to playing baseball.The more passions we have,the more happiness we are likely to experience.Finally,the belief that something permanent transcends8) us and that our existence has some larger meaning can help us be happier.We need a spiritual faith,or a philosophy of life.Whatever your philosophy,it should include this truism9):if you choose to find the positive in virtually every situation,you will be blessed,and if you choose to find the awful ,you will be cursed.As with happiness itself,this is largely your decision to make. 8599

世界杯热点:半决赛在即,章鱼哥选了西班牙? -- :9: 来源: 章鱼哥保罗的预测在世界杯上一次又一次的成功,创造了奇迹,把自己的名字深深的刻在了广大球迷的心中  本次世界杯,举世瞩目的西班牙对德国这场半决赛将于北京时间7月8日周四:30分举行章鱼哥的预测成为大家关注的焦点,各地群众纷纷询问:  “Does anyone know when the pick the game against Spain will take place?”  谁知道对西班牙的预测啥时候进行啊?  “Has the octopus Paul picked a winner the Germany v Spain match as yet?”  章鱼哥保罗对德国和西班牙的比赛预测了没?  What did Paul the Octopus say about the Spain vs. Germany match?  西班牙对德国,章鱼哥保罗说啥了?  于是,最近网上流传了这么一张照片章鱼哥保罗选择了西班牙作为胜利的一方  Paul, the German octopus that predicted every German World Cup match so far has picked Spain to win the upcoming semi-final章鱼哥保罗选择了西班牙作为胜利的一方  德国球迷们看到这张照片应该会心碎一地吧  经过小编最新求,这张照片——是假的!twitter上有人发了对比图,从章鱼哥的姿势和周围的环境来看,是之前德国对塞尔维亚的那场的翻版从章鱼哥的姿势和周围的环境来看,上一张照片是之前德国对塞尔维亚的那场的翻版  目前,还没有章鱼哥预测的最新消息 在即 热点 世界杯 章鱼哥

Growth That Starts From ThinkingIt seems to me a very difficult thing to put into words the beliefs we hold and what they make you do in your life. I think I was tunate because I grew up in a family where there was a very deep religious feeling. I don’t think it was spoken of a great deal. It was more or less taken granted that everybody held certain beliefs and needed certain reincements of their own strength and that that came through your belief in God and your knowledge of prayer.But as I grew older I questioned a great many of the things that I knew very well my grandmother who had brought me up had taken granted. And I think I might have been a quite difficult person to live with if it hadn’t been the fact that my husband once said it didn’t do you any harm to learn those things, so why not let your children learn them? When they grow up they’ll think things out themselves.And that gave me a feeling that perhaps that’s what we all must do—think out ourselves what we could believe and how we could live by it. And so I came to the conclusion that you had to use this life to develop the very best that you could develop.I don’t know whether I believe in a future life. I believe that all that you go through here must have some value, theree there must be some reason. And there must be some “going on.” How exactly that happens I’ve never been able to decide. There is a future—that I’m sure of. But how, that I don’t know. And I came to feel that it didn’t really matter very much because whatever the future held you’d have to face it when you came to it, just as whatever life holds you have to face it exactly the same way. And the important thing was that you never let down doing the best that you were able to do—it might be poor because you might not have very much within you to give, or to help other people with, or to live your life with. But as long as you did the very best that you were able to do, then that was what you were put here to do and that was what you were accomplishing by being here.And so I have tried to follow that out—and not to worry about the future or what was going to happen. I think I am pretty much of a fatalist. You have to accept whatever comes and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage and with the best that you have to give. 63530

Getting What You Want in LifeThere are lives that have b in abundance and yet are starved; with barns and warehouses filled, with shelves and larders laden they are empty and hungry. No man need envy them; their feverish, restless whirl in the dust of publicity is but the search a satisfaction never to be found in things.They are called rich in a world where no others are more truly, pitiably poor; having all, they are yet lacking in all because they have neglected the things within. The abundance of b is the cause of many a man's deeper hunger. Having known nothing of the discipline that develops life's hidden sources of satisfaction, nothing of the struggle in which deep calls unto deep and the true life finds itself, he spends his days seeking to satisfy his soul with furniture, with houses and lands, with yachts and merchandise, seeking to feed his heart on things, a process of less promise and reason than feeding a snapping turtle on thoughts.It takes many of us altogether too long to learn that you cannot find satisfaction so long as you leave the soul out of your reckoning. If the heart be empty the life cannot be filled. The flow must cease at the faucet if the fountains go dry. The prime, the elemental necessities of our being are the life rather than the body, its house.But, how often out of the marble edifice issues the poor emaciated inmate, how out of the life having many things comes that which amounts to nothing. The essential things are not often those which most ily strike our blunt senses. We see the shell first. To the undeveloped mind the material is all there is. But looking deeper into life there comes an awakening to the fact and the significance of the spiritual, the feeling that the reason, the emotions, the joys and pains that have nothing to do with things, the ties that knit one to the infinite,all of which constitute the permanent elements of life. 8

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